NXT UK Bytesize: 13th May 2021
Back on UK shores after NWA Powerrr, Paul reviews this weeks NXT UK.
What’s up guys and girls! It’s “The Belt Guy” Paul, back again with another Bytesized NXT UK review!
Hopefully this week's episode doesn’t suffer from the same problems as last week, big shout out to the Bomber, Dave Mastiff, hope he is recovering well.
Tonight see’s the five-woman gauntlet match to determine the new number one contender to the NXT UK Women’s Championship, currently held by Kay Lee Ray. Also, Noam Dar takes on Nathan Frazer in a Heritage Cup Rules match.
Should be a good one, so let's get into it!
Noam Dar and Nathan Frazer get us underway tonight in their Heritage Cup Rules match.
Round one really sets the pace, both men going back and forth as they feel each other out. Dar takes a cheap shot just after the bell rings, which seems to only fire up Frazer, as he seals the first fall in 59 seconds of Round two!
Round three begins and Frazer is in complete control, until a certain loud mouthed East End Butcher comes down to ringside and takes Dar’s corner. Dar briefly turned the tide here but Frazer fought back hitting a beautiful Final Cut. He went up top looking for the finish, but Sha Samuels distracted him long enough for the bell to sound to end Round three.
Round four begins and both Dar and Frazer kick it into high gear, trading some furious, hard shots. Dar submits Frazer in 74 seconds, Frazer tapping out to an arm submission, which Dar then held on to after the bell.
Round five went into an all-out war in the early stages. Frazer again in control, but a distraction from Sha Samuels gave Dar the opportunity to hit his finisher and steal the second fall for the win.
This was a good opening match, but I don’t see where they are going with this? Surely, Frazer will need a partner at some point unless they plan to continue down the two-on-one route, which benefits nobody.
Backstage Shenanigans! - Part One
After the opening match we get our customary jaunt backstage.
First up is a recap of last week’s Gallus/Rampage Brown altercation, where they literally just played the same vignette. If I wanted to repeat the same thing over and over, I’d go back to working in call centres!
If you know, you know...
Next up is a video promo of the NXT UK Tag Team Champions, Pretty Deadly. Usual spiel from them, literally nothing new really.
After the Gallus boys remind us they’re on top, and we get some “Yes Boy's” from Stoker and Howley, we get a backstage clip showing Trent Seven comforting Jack Starz, who is upset and acting like a 14-year-old boy who cant get a date on prom night because Piper Niven isn’t here today (He even says “I thought we had something special.... Oh boy....)
Can anyone hear that rumble? Because a Thunderstorm is brewing! Here comes Sam Gradwell, shooting his mouth off at Trent Seven again, reiterating the same things he said last time out. Which earns him a hearty slap TO THE FACE!!! from the proprietor of Moustache Mountain. Do you know, it ALMOST seems like they might be about to face each other soon...?
Serious Subculture Spectacle
Back to the ring now, and Levi Muir is waiting in the ring. Well, it seems we might need some Michael Cole up in here...
With new music and new gear, here comes the trio of Subculture! Mark Andrews heads to the ring with Flash Morgan Webster and Dani Luna in tow, so it seems he will be taking on Levi Muir. Maybe it won't be a squash match then?
Nope, definitely not a squash match! Muir looked really good in this match, playing the bigger man role to perfection and getting a near fall after a huge powerslam.
But ultimately, this match was all about showcasing the new rebranded Subculture, and after hitting some of his signature Mark Andrews offence in the form of the knee slide into the enzuigiri, Stundog Millionaire and a suicide dive, he dispatched Muir with a shooting star press.
Big fan of these three so I’m glad to see them getting something big to do, and great to see Mark Andrews back in action, without him, I fall to pieces... (Get it? Because of his song?.... Oh, alright then...)
Backstage Shenanigans! - Part Two
Former wrestler Sid Scala is backstage now, talking to an off-screen interviewer about finding a replacement for Xia Brookside in tonight's gauntlet match as she had been ruled out. (I’m guessing Meiko Satomura will be the replacement...)
Before Sid can really get a word out Amale appears, demanding Xia’s spot in the match. Sid puts her down faster than the ball WWE dropped when they released Samoa Joe.
He tells her there is no way she is being rewarded for her behaviour last week. Amale demands a match, so Sid says she can have one against Xia Brookside once she is medically cleared.
No white flags here though! Amale starts yelling at Sid in French. Fortunately, I am fluent in French* and so was able to fully translate this:
“Oh my God Sid, you trumped up fuck-knuckle! Seriously what even is the point of you? Do you do anything other than stand here and adjust your tie each week? Remember when you used to wrestle? Remember when you nearly beat Chris Hero? Doesn’t Johnny Saint need his sponge bath right about now? You colossal waste of oxygen!”
….. Poetic, right?
*This is a lie.
Next up, a short vignette of the Amir Jordan and Kenny Williams match from last week. We get to see Amir Jordan backstage crying more than a 12-year-old girl at a Justin Bieber concert, as he is led to the medical room.
I’m gonna go out on a limb here and say that Amir Jordan will be back in NXT UK before long...
Former wrestler Sid Scala is back now in a sit-down talk with A-Kid and Tyler Bate, as they face each other next week with the NXT UK Heritage Cup Championship Trophy on the line. Hold on, let me just check my calendar...
A lot of male posturing and dick swinging in this. A-Kid says life has been better since he won the cup, whereas Tyler says that the Heritage Cup was made for him.
A-Kid reminds him that he beat him for it once before, and Tyler says he doesn’t have the experience needed to beat him, and that his overconfidence will be his downfall. Seriously lads just whip them out and compare so we can be done with this...
The segment ends with the two shaking hands tensely.
Jokes aside, I am really looking forward to this one. These two always deliver against each other, so I’m expecting this rubber match to be an epic encounter.
Final promo of the night goes to Noam Dar’s Supernova Sessions (which according to Nigel McGuinness is why Peacock wanted to buy the WWE Network...) as we are told that next week, Noam Dar’s guest on Supernova Sessions will be none other than Ilja Dragunov.
If that session doesn’t end with Noam Dar and Sha Samuels having their heads shoved up their own arses, then it will have flopped in my opinion!
Time to throw down the Gauntlet...
Isla Dawn starts the match against “Not-Millie” McKenzie. After some near falls from both competitors, Isla Dawn seals the first win after a half nelson suplex. Next up is Subculture’s Dani Luna, who throws Dawn around the ring like she’s fragile parcel, and Luna a Hermes deliverywoman!
Despite dominating her, Dawn secures the win after Luna rams into the ring post shoulder first, allowing Dawn to roll her up. Dawn continues on!
Hey, can someone answer that phone? Because I called it! Out comes “The Final Boss”, Meiko Satomura!
Dawn is clearly tiring, but puts up a great fight against Satomura, taking her outside and giving her more than she can handle. After Dawn got a near fall, taking Satomura down with a double knee strike, Satomura transitioned from an armbar into a pinfall. Dawn put up a hell of a fight, but I guess her black magic didn’t get the job done. Maybe she needs to listen to some more Little Mix...
Final woman out is my least favourite in the division. And by least favourite, I mean I hate her more than Adz hates Moose!
Jinny gets in the ring, accompanied by Joseph Conners at ringside, and immediately goes after Satomura. Begrudgingly, I have to admit that at this point Jinny displayed some fantastic technical grappling alongside the much more experienced Satomura.
After some great ground based back and forth, Satomura locks in the STF, but Jinny reaches the ropes. At this point, Joseph Conners tries to intervene, but earns a kick to what I’m sure was supposed to be the mid-section, but looked more like it caught him in the mummy-daddy button.
Jinny attempted to turn the tide in her favour, but Satomura isn't called “The Final Boss” for nothing. She was more than ready for that and stopped Jinny in her tracks, hitting the Scorpio Rising for the three count and the win. Meiko Satomura is the number one contender to the NXT UK Women’s Championship!
As Satomura stands in the ring, out comes Kay Lee Ray. She gets into the ring, and bows respectfully to Satomura. As she returns the bow in kind, Kay Lee Ray uses the opportunity to superkick her straight in the jaw.
The show ends with Kay Lee Ray once again proclaiming herself the Forever Champion. At least, I think that’s what she said, she was speaking Scottish, and I’m not nearly as fluent in that as I am in French...
So that was this week's NXT UK. In ring action wasn't too bad, but again, no WALTER. It’s beginning to annoy me a little that, as the NXT UK Champion, he should be appearing a great deal more than he is. I get that travel restrictions are tough right now, but if that’s the case plan ahead, record more with him when he is there so that you have more to use in the coming weeks.
Jordan Devlin has yet to resurface after NXT Takeover Stand and Deliver too, so hopefully he is back soon as well.
Thanks for reading, and don’t forget to check out my review of this week's NWA Powerrr too, which you can find here.
As ever, until next time, I’ll see you at the matches!